Creating and suffering

Many times I take some time composing music (or for that matter writing), and in a deep self doubt ask if not pester them of their value, people, connoisseurs or commoners, often impatiently say, “If you like to compose, then keep composing, and what’s wrong with it?” Very wrong. Art after all, many of them might claim, is therapeutic, healing the our wounds physical or metaphysical, while I maintain stiffly but obliquely that not all that is healing is a good, and not all that is good is healing, for I suffer when, suffering the suffering of others, creating good work so that they themselves again suffer squarely the pain when they appreciate it, in addition to what pain they already have, and therefore how am I writing for sake of healing those wounded, myself included, but not of suffering?

May 29, 2021